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I am up tonight bawling.  After dreaming about my bio dad last night (why are dreams so weird??) I decided to google his name tonight.  I found the forum site of the Patriot Guard Riders.  More specifically, I found the page where they posted Mike's services to get riders to attend.

The sheer respect and caring in the words written for his passing by complete strangers floored me.  I wasn't able to respond with a thank you as the forum is private, but somebody had an actual email listed.  I debated and debated and finally decided to send a brief thank you.

These men and women attend services for soldiers and bear flags and salute and accompany the procession, blocking traffic at each street.  They stand at attention for soldiers they have never met.   They do it with such respect and professionalism that it is easy to forget that they are volunteers.

The floodgates are open and I am getting a "cry headache", but I know it has to all come out.  Being on vacation immediately after his funeral buffered the pain.  Now that I am home the finality is hitting.